Alex was there. Fuck, fuck, he does remember. He remembers some of it. Not all of it, clearly, clearly, fuck, Tim doesn't want to do this, he can't do this.

What does he say? How the fuck does he go about dropping this sort of fucking bombshell, oh, by the way, you're fucking dead and I got to fucking watch.

"Alex shot you."

It's cold, it's blunt, and Tim hates how utterly detached it comes out. Of all of them, Jay was the one who knew the least about any of it and should have been able to get out alive, he was the one who fucking deserved to get out and not Tim, who lied and stole and killed and clawed his way out of that mess only to learn he was the cause of it in the first place.

"I went, um, through the footage," he adds sloppily, staring at the rug without seeing it, it's so fucking cold and Jay is standing right here and none of it was supposed to happen, none of it, and this is a dream and it doesn't matter what Tim says anyway, because it's only a fucking dream. Is this meant to be closure? Tim doesn't fucking want it. He didn't fucking want closure then, he didn't want to be the only one to live through this, and here he fucking well is. "Alex shot you. You, uh. It didn't - you didn't look -"

Fuck. Shit. He can't just say this, Jay, you're dead, you're dead and I didn't do shit about it except stab Alex in the neck and hope that fixed everything.

(It didn't.)

(It doesn't get fixed. Not while Tim's still alive.)

"You died. Okay?" Not okay. That's not how you break that news to someone. Is there a good way to do it? Is there, at all?