"It was stated in the past tense," replies Janan. "If you had not --"

"It was not my intention," Rashad cuts in breathlessly. "I did not -- I did not think." The admission is shocking to him. He has acted rashly before under the emotions of others, but showing such an egregious lack of judgment under his own -- under the emotions he feels now all the time -- it is different. It is different, and it is abhorrent. "I am not well," he moans, stumbling backward up the stairs.